I was reminded today that coffee sets off “The Pain”. It’s like pouring salt on a wound except it’s pouring coffee onto the nerves in my back that hurt. “The Internet” (maybe I’ll just start calling anything from the WWW, if that’s still a thing, AI). Anyway, AI says (hey I like that term, search results are intelligence and they’re artificial! Bingo! “AI” it is, to describe any rubbish I get from my browser.
OK, sorry, back to the point of this phenomenon supporting YES on the surgery in that, SRS is known for stomach issues, Facet Joint Syndrome, (FJS, my latest theory and first excuse for backing out of my upcoming surgery), is not. but here comes a bunch of NOs…
Facet Joint Syndrome
I was originally diagnosed with Facet Joint Syndrome. I even had an ablation which may have worked but it I think it was aimed wrong, creating new and different pain. I remember my left side swelling up like a football when the ablation was over. I want to say that it did relieve my primary pain for a couple of years but I can’t be sure. At any rate, the ablation was a bad experience and for some reason, I never went back to that diagnosis. Neither did the doctors.
PET scans have detected rib joint reuptake on the left>right but no facet joint issues. Oops, there’s a big YES. I can bend backwards a long way (YES) but I do reach a point that seems to send a jolt through The Pain (NO!). This is what makes me wonder the most. But that whole area (the three joints) is bound to be inflamed and I’m sure there are limits to the others as well, they are just more protected from stupid human moves. One of the ways they are protected (the rib joints) is from their ribs’ third connection in the front, which most ribs have. Now we know we’ve been lied to our whole lives. Did you know most people have 6 floating ribs? That’s right! Most of us have three floating ribs per side, not two! Now they’re telling is it’s about half and half and three has a slight (percentage or two, or three) edge. From pictures like the one at the top, Slipping Rib Syndrome is also just a variation of the norm. They are saying that is from a “Normal Chest”! So I have two congenitally floating 10th ribs and 2 subluxated 9th ribs (the left is more so). Both my sides click the same. However I only have symptoms on one the left? Why? Apparently this “condition” is often bilateral but with unilateral pain. Perhaps my hernia made them symptomatic, or that girl who walked on my back. But that volleyball incident was a hyperextension of my spine and haunted me for years. If my memory is correct, it was the same but lighter version of my current pain (The Pain). This equates to a big NO! It says that my problem is not SRS but FJS!
So we have one YES from the coffee trigger and a couple of NOs from SRS’s nimesis, FJS. We’ve discovered that I have floating 10th ribs and my ninth ribs are subluxated up under my 8th ribs, which should be irritating my eighth intercostal nerve but it’s NOt. My pain is from the 10th rib area (maybe 9th or 11th but not 8th!). So NO! But none of this really matters. I think I have to get this surgery for a couple of reasons….
Barbara
She has been a proponent of this surgery and theory the whole way. I’m much more skeptical. I’m giving it a 30/70 chance of making things significantly better but I have to do it for Barbara. It’s actually considered “minimally invasive” but I think it was Dr. Laurencin or somebody that said only a thoracic surgeon would consider it minimally invasive. I’m freaking out because Dr. Hansen basically told me it was the end of my active life, at least doing the sports I like to do. He pointed out that it should probably be that way anyway and I suppose he’s right. I was talking to Babs about it being an addiction and how it keeps me from enjoying the little things. I’m always chasing the dragon, wanting to be on the water or the trail, not in the moment. So whether this works or not, Barbara wants this surgery and ultimately I think it will be good for me to let go of my active life and pay more attention to her, enjoy the little things with her. Sigh… well at least this makes the decision easier.
Time to Break Out the Big Guns
I just turned 65 and my life is shit. I’m a miserable asshole who’s making everyone else’s life shit. Even if this is the red herring I think it is, it really won’t make things much worse. So there’s everything to gain and not really that much to lose. I keep hoping for a miracle cure that just isn’t coming. If this doesn’t work, I’ll turn our attention back to the facet joint. Fuck I really wish I could get a facet joint injection before the surgery.